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Friday, December 24, 2010

Dads and Teenage Pregnancy

Teenage moms are responsible for nearly 10 percent of all births in the United States. Considering that, according to the Center for Disease Control, there were 4.1 million babies born in the US in 2009, that means that approximately 410,000 babies were born to teenage moms, whom the CDC classifies as girls between the ages of 15-19. So we're talking about girls between ninth grade and freshmen in college.

Dads, heads up here. This shouldn't be happening. I know this is a complex dilemma and solutions aren't simple. But, I can guarantee you that if Dads are more active in their daughters' lives, more vocal, more involved (in a positive way, Dads) we can put a big dent in this number.

Some other alarming observations from this report http://www.cdc.gov/media/pressrel/2010/r101221.html : The teen birth rate in America continues to be higher than the rate of 16 other developed countries. Experts have no answers, only speculation about whether teens are having the same amount of sex, whether their use of contraception has changed or whether they are getting pregnant at the same rate as they used to but are obtaining more abortions.

The interesting aspect of this report by the CDC is that the Associated Press article was crafted to "celebrate" the fact that the teen birth rate in America has declined since last it was reported.

I don't know about you, but the fact that more than 400,000 teenagers had babies last year is nothing to celebrate. Which leads a Dad to think about another question...What percentage of teenage girls are having sex but not getting pregnant? And, 'how can I scare the crap out of my daughter's boyfriend?'

It's been well-documented that teenage pregnancy can be a prescription for derailing a young girl's life. It no only makes it difficult to complete high school, the bare minimum for being able to have modest professional success. But it almost eliminates the opportunity to pursue a college degree, a better opportunity for professional success.

Add to the educational challenges the physical impact of having a baby. If any Dads can recall the physical trauma your wife went through to have your daughter, imagine your teenage daughter enduring that ordeal. What impact will that have on a 15-year old's body? What long-term negative consequences could that spell for those girls?

Not to mention the high risk for the survival of the babies born to teenage girls. Teenage girls' bodies are not physically mature enough to give birth, let alone nourish a healthy fetus.

I'm not attempting to portray my version of "scared straight," but the reality can be harsh. The logical question is what's a Father to do? After all, you can't go on your daughter's dates with her, can you? Probably not, although I've thought about it, and plotted in my mind how I could do that without being detected.  There's lots of little things we can do to make an impression.

I have two daughters of dating age. I am almost terrified when they go on dates. Even if I know the teenage boy, and even if I approve (grudgingly) of him. I've told my girls that even when they get married and are truly in love, I'll never fully embrace the men in their lives.

One of the things I've instituted, and my wife supports this... House rule is no boyfriends till senior high. Even at that, I discourage boyfriend-girlfriend stuff until at least 10th grade. Research shows that the earlier girls get into formal relationships with boys, the sooner they are likely to have physical relationships with boys. Why start that clock ticking any earlier than necessary?  Few things turn my stomach than watching girls in my daughter's eighth grade class swapping spit with boys, in broad daylight, in front of strangers, as if no one were around. Anyway, I digress. This is just one thing I've tried to do to prevent my daughters from getting into situations that they aren't ready for.

We'll talk more about this subject in future posts. Leave me a comment, better yet, join as a follower so you receive regular updates.

Merry Christmas!

P.S. Tell your daughter you love her

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